I make your girlfriend scream louder then steamed eggnog.
This is the best thing ever.
"MAN THIS STORY I’M WRITING IS GONNA BE SO GOOD I’M SO PUMPED"
"I CAN’T WAIT TO DEVELOP THE SHIT OUT OF THESE CHARACTERS"
"HOT DAMN THAT ONE SCENE NEAR THE MIDDLE IS GONNA BE BITCHIN’"
"THIS PLOT TWIST IS THE SINGLE BEST IDEA I’VE EVER HAD IN MY LIFE"
~one hour later~
don’t say you’re a writer if you just write fanfiction for your entertainment. you’re only a writer if you kill a bear with a typewriter to appease the spirit of hemingway and slather yourself in ink in tribute to shakespeare, the one true over-penis of literature.
I was really mad but then I wasn’t.